


Only Tears Remain

by GrandDukeForever



Series: Smoke and Mirrors [2]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous or Implied Relationship(s) - Freeform, Angst, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Implied Relationships, Implied Slash, Implied/Referenced Incest, Incest, M/M, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-14
Updated: 2013-11-14
Packaged: 2018-01-01 14:14:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1044899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrandDukeForever/pseuds/GrandDukeForever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><b>Raleigh’s side.</b> For the Pacific Rim kink meme prompt, which reads: “For some reason, Raleigh is offered the chance to go back and undo his previous mistakes. Let's set this before Operation Pitfall, before he meets Mako and gets into Gipsy again. Someone or something offers Raleigh the chance to undo his mistakes, and he takes it. He finds himself back in the Icebox, the morning of Gipsy's deployment against Knifehead.</p><p>Mindful of what's going to happen, Raleigh (and Yancy, who's worried about what happened to change his brother seemingly overnight) don't disobey orders. They hold the Miracle Mile. They don't go for the boat. And Knifehead still kills Yancy, just the way it happens in the movie.</p><p>Think about it. Gipsy was the only Jaeger deployed against Knifehead. There was no backup. All the brother's experience told them that once a kaiju goes down, it's dead. There was nothing anyone could have done to change the result.</p><p>make me cry Anons!”</p><p>Original prompt can be found here: http://pacificrimkink.livejournal.com/2747.html?thread=3883195#t3883195</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chasing Visions

**Author's Note:**

> Woo hoo! Finally did it! Sorry this took so long to get out; I didn't expect it to take as much time as it did. Anyway, I ran out of room in the main summary because the OP's prompt was so long, so the rest of the notes are here.
> 
> Again, this fic features prominently Becketcest. There’s a little more Thor/Loki here than there was in the other installment, but still, if you’re looking for that to be a main pairing, then this probably isn’t the story for you. As much as I love hits, comments, and kudos, I do not wish to falsely advocate my story. On the other hand, if this is what you happen to be looking for, I hope that you all enjoy it! Dark!Loki warning again, by the way. Oh, and Dark!Thor this time too.
> 
> On a completely unrelated note, I discovered a few days ago that a few more people have subscribed to my author feed and I even have a few people subscribed to my OC-centric _Pacific Rim_ fic! Yay! :D *Does a super happy dance* Seriously made my day to find that a lot more people seem to be enjoying that one more than I had anticipated. Hope there are readers out there that enjoy this one as well!
> 
> By the way, I started writing this well before I watched _Thor: The Dark World_ , so any similarities are purely coincidental and not meant to be movie spoilers. I only used what I saw from the trailer and my imagination.

Raleigh spent months obsessing, trying to piece together all the little images he had obtained from his brother through the Drift. It was all he had left of his brother anymore, aside from the photographs. Perhaps if there was no hope in somehow reuniting with Yancy in his current lifetime, the pictures would have been enough. Raleigh had seen things though, in the last few moments when he had still been connected to his brother, and though he had the sense that he hadn’t seen everything, Raleigh was pretty sure that he had gotten the gist.

There had been a lifetime before this one; an alternate reality. Where Raleigh had been dead instead and not Yancy. He couldn't wrap his head around it, and yet, he knew that what he had seen was absolutely true. If there was one thing the Drift didn't do, it was lie; not where memories were concerned.

He had spent the first few weeks, after having woken up to find himself in a hospital bed, recovering. Brooding. Drawing up a plan of action.

Raleigh had to find the stone. He just had to.

Meanwhile, in Asgard, Loki sat somberly in his maximum security prison. The intensity of the forcefield suppressing his magic had been increased after his last stunt, which had been changing the time line of the human realm. The All-Father had not been pleased. Neither had Thor.

“ _Just what were you thinking, Loki?”_ his brother had asked him after thundering into his prison. _“Did you honestly think no one would notice?”_  

Loki had resisted rolling his eyes at the question; of course he had. As wrapped up as the Asgardians were in their parties and politics, Loki knew something as glaring as Earth's history being tampered with would not go by unnoticed. Still, it hadn't stopped him from responding to his brother's question with a smart comment. 

“ _Oh, come now, Thor...”_ he had said to his adoptive brother. _“You didn't expect me to just be sitting here, twiddling my thumbs for eternity now, did you?”_  

The blonde had frowned at him. _“Loki..._ _I don't think you understand_ _what you have done._ _Why did you do it?_ _”_  

“ _To tell you the truth, I don't see what all the fuss is over,”_ Loki had said in response. _“It isn't as if our world was affected. Even **I** don't have the strength for **that** kind of magic...or are you just worried about how it's affected your precious Jane...?”_  

He had added the last part out of bitterness and the words had indeed found their mark. Loki remembered the mixture of hurt and irritation that had flashed through his brother's eyes. It was everything he had thought that he had wanted to see at one point in his life. Well before that moment, he had already known that he was wrong; had been, for a while. Of course, as always, it was pride that kept him from admitting the truth. 

“ _All this time...all these years, and still you do not know me,”_ Thor had said to him then, his eyes had been sad. _“Lately I'm finally starting to think that Father is right. That there is no saving you.”_  

There had been no smile, no twinkle in the man's eyes when he had said it. The thunder god had finally tired of Loki's childish games of pinching and pulling. The trickster's worst fear had finally been actualized—his beloved Thor had finally grown up in addition to the two of them growing apart. 

So much had been left unsaid that day. Plenty of unsaid words lingered heavily in the air. Loki had watched his brother turn with the flow of his cape and leave the room, never once stopping to look over his shoulder as he had in the past. 

He had kept his resolve until the giant doors leading to his cage slammed shut and once again Loki found himself completely alone in his prison. He had then turned his back towards the transparent wall and slowly dropped to the floor, sitting on it cross-legged. Shortly afterward he had held out his hands and willed for an orb to appear between them. While his ability to cast magic outside of confinement had been considerably lessened, for some reason the Jötun had been allowed to cast his spells within his locked box. Loki supposed this was one of Thor's final requests on his behalf. 

Now that the All-Father was aware of his stone, and with the strengthened security—which he did feel—that suppressed his ability to use it as his channel to the outside world, Loki supposed that he would lay low for a while until he could figure out what his next move would be. In the meantime, he thought he would indulge a bit of his curiosity. He'd been wondering how a certain young man was doing; the younger brother of a human that had caught his interest some time ago. 

“ _Why did you do it?”_ Thor had asked him. 

Loki hadn't responded because he didn't think his brother would have believed him, nor did he think the other man would have tried to understand if he had. _They're in love. They're brothers. I wanted to see them succeed._ These thoughts were all true for Loki, and yet, if he had admitted to wanting to live vicariously through such mortal creatures, he was sure Thor would have thought him mad. 

“ _Why not the real thing, then, instead?”_ he imagined his brother saying to him in one fictional scenario. 

The answer to that was simple. Thor hated him now. Even in the off-chance that he didn't, there was still also the matter of Jane. Loki could never tell whether his brother was being serious or frivolous about her like he had been with lovers in the past. 

“ _If you wanted them to be happy, then why let one die?”_ he envisaged his brother asking in another another scenario. 

To that, there was no best answer. If anything, Loki somewhat regretted his reason for doing so now. Of course, he was used to that sort of thing; as calculated as he was in his actions, he was always doomed to do things that he'd regret in the end, it seemed. 

He had let one die because it had been the older one who had made the request. In Loki's mind at the time, it was an indirect way of having his brother pay for not being his. It had been rather petty of him, he had to admit, not to mention foolish. The orb began to glow when it located the younger Becket, and Loki felt his heart clench upon seeing how sad the younger man seemed, because it reminded him all the more of his own anguish. 

By this point, Chau had already managed to summon Loki once more—this was what ultimately alerted the Asgardians to the secret behind his latest trick—and had once again become a black market tycoon. As a result, Loki wasn't sure if he could be summoned through the stone anymore. 

“Pitiful...” the god of deceit muttered to himself as he watched the young man type furiously on his computer's keyboard. “Now...what on earth are you searching for...?” 

For days, Raleigh had forced himself to take naps. Only by doing so was he able to more effectively tap in to his brother's lingering memories that were quickly fading away into the deep recesses of the Drift. At this point a month had passed, and Raleigh knew he was running out of time. He would only have access to the phantom memories for so long now that Yancy was dead. 

The key to finding the stone was to figure out where the man named Hannibal Chau was, though Raleigh had a feeling the man was most likely already in Hong Kong. Raleigh was sure that wherever the man was, that was mostly likely where the stone was also going to be. 

It took several more weeks of searching and reaching out to several of his old contacts from when he had been employed by the PPDC. Finally though, he had a hit. Raleigh bought the soonest flight he could find out of Anchorage heading towards Hong Kong the first chance he got. 

With information given to him by his contacts, Chau turned out to not be that difficult a man to find. An odd feeling of déjá vu overcame Chau upon seeing the blonde, which led him to ask a question, though it was most uncharacteristic of him to do so. 

“I deal with many people and I don't forget many faces...” Chau said as he observed Raleigh carefully. “Though I can't say I remember yours. Have we met before?” 

“You know my brother,” Raleigh said with a wry smile. “...sort of.” 

Chau raised an eyebrow. “Oh...? How interesting.” 

“Ain't it?” Raleigh said dryly. 

Chau cleared his throat and clasped his hands behind his back. “Well...! I assume, like most people, you've come here searching for something.”

“ _Il Rovescio di Fortun_ _a_ ,” Raleigh said, without missing a beat. “I know you have it.” 

The other man was unsure whether to feel impressed or wary at the blonde's confidence and knowledge of an item in his wares. On a normal day, Chau might have tried to put the young man in his place; however, given his personal experience with the item being asked for accompanied with the strange feeling in his gut regarding the blonde, Chau was more than happy to part with the cursed talisman in his possession.

He didn't ask questions that he didn't want the answers to, and Chau had a feeling this was one of those times. He gave the younger man an affirmative nod and motioned for him to follow. 

“Come,” he said. “I believe I do have what you are looking for.” 

When Chau led Raleigh to the stone, he eyed the blonde with mild curiosity. The way in which the young man seemed to regard the object gave Chau the sense that the man was rather familiar with it and knew exactly what the stone was capable of doing. Perhaps he had employed its services once before. The thought made Chau inwardly shudder. 

 _“ _If he's done this before...what price has he paid that wasn't enough to deter him from calling on that evil spirit again?”__ Chau wondered. 

Raleigh gingerly fingered the stone and looked up at the overlord. “This is it, all right. I'll take it. How much do you want for it?” 

The older man debated on whether or not he was being asked a trick question. Finally deciding that it wasn't, he responded. 

“ Call it an introductory gift,” Chau said in an even tone. “Use at your own risk.” 

The blonde gave him an ironic smile. For some reason, Chau felt only half-surprised by this. 

“Mind if I borrow this space for a bit?” Raleigh asked, motioning to the area around them. 

“Suit yourself,” Chau said with a slight shrug; he was curious as to how much the young man knew. “You know how it works?” 

Raleigh chuckled darkly. “Wouldn't be here if I didn't. Trust me.” 

Chau did, though he had no explanation as to why. He adjusted the jacket he was wearing. 

“Well then...I'll leave you to it,” he said gruffly before turning around. 

He had no interest in becoming reacquainted with the creature that could be summoned from the stone. Chau didn't wait for the blonde to utter his thanks and briskly walked out of the room, leaving the younger man to his own devices. 

In his prison, Loki had been watching everything unfold in the orb between his hands with some interest. He raised an eyebrow upon feeling a familiar tingle course through his blood when Raleigh lightly tapped a finger against the stone .

“Well, well...” Loki whispered to himself. “This should prove interesting yet.”


	2. The Trickster's Stone

For once, Loki had no explanation as to how things happened. One minute, he was staring at the younger brother of the human whose wish he'd granted a lifetime ago in the orb of magic he had summoned between his hands, and in the next, he was suddenly seeing things through his otherworldly vessel on Earth. He didn't realize that he was in a daze until the blonde's voice cut through his thoughts.

“You seem...surprised.”

If Loki had a jaw in this form, it probably would have set. “...pardon?” 

“It's just...” Raleigh trailed off with a frown. “You _are_ Loki...aren't you?” 

“Of course I am!” Loki snapped. “What kind of question is that? Foolish human...”

“Ah...well that's a relief,” Raleigh said, relaxing his shoulders. “Then I'd like to ask something of you.”

The trickster felt himself bristle. “Quite bold, aren't you?” 

Raleigh shrugged, sticking out his chin slightly in subtle challenge. “I see no reason to beat around the bush. I know who you are. I know what you're capable of doing.” 

If Loki's eyes could have narrowed in this form, he would have narrowed them. “If you truly know...then I can't imagine why you would take the risk. I was under the impression that humans quite valued their mortal lives.” 

“Well then...this would make me the second exception you've come across, am I right?” Raleigh asked.

Again, if Loki were capable in this form, he might have frowned. “What was that? How would you know whom I have or have not met?”

“You deny it?” Raleigh countered. 

Loki flared. “You impudent...! State your business! Why have you summoned me here?” 

“Thought you would've figured that out by now,” said Raleigh. “It's not like I've really been subtle about it. I'm here for the same reason my brother was.” 

Loki felt his supernatural form grow rigid, despite its liquid base. “You...how can you know that?”

Raleigh shrugged. “He didn't break his contract with you, if that's what you're worried about.” 

“Then how could you possibly know?” Loki asked. “Explain.” 

“Look, I don't know how advanced things are where you're from,” said Raleigh. “Or if you'll even be able to understand what I'm about to tell you...”

“You'd do well not to underestimate my intelligence,” the trickster said testily. “I am a transcendent being, not a simpleminded creature such as yourself.” 

Raleigh was able to gracefully brush aside the insult. “All right...well let me lay it out for you then.” 

“Please do,” Loki said dryly. 

“Honestly, I don't know where to start,” Raleigh said, rubbing the back of his neck. “To put it simply, I found out about the deal my brother made with you through the Drift, but...to understand that, you'd have to understand how Jaegers work, and to know that, you'd have to know what a Jaeger is.” 

“I am well aware what a Jaeger is, _mortal_ ,” Loki said with annoyance. “As well as the creatures they were built to fight. It was rather entertaining to watch, actually. It was pure luck that saved your species from total annihilation.” 

Raleigh unconsciously clenched a fist. “All right then. Well, were you aware of the way pilots were able to communicate with each other without the use of words?” 

“No,” Loki admitted, somewhat begrudgingly. “Of that I do not believe I am all that familiar.” 

“Allow me to enlighten you then,” Raleigh said with mild derision.

“I'd mind your tone,” Loki warned. 

The blonde somewhat held up his hands. “I meant no disrespect.” 

“Hm...very well. I will accept your apology,” said Loki. “This time. I will not tolerate any further insolence.” 

“Understood...” said Raleigh. 

“Good,” Loki said with a nod. “Now tell me about this 'drift' you've mentioned.” 

“So assuming you kind of know how operating a Jaeger works,” said Raleigh. “Then I'm guessing you've seen or are at least aware of how pilots are connected to the machines?” 

“Yes,” Loki confirmed. 

“Well, there's this thing called a _neural handshake_ ,” said Raleigh. “It's a process where the minds of both pilots become connected in a place called the Drift.”

“Go on,” said Loki. 

“The Drift is a place where thoughts and memories between pilots mix,” said Raleigh. “Once you're plugged in, there's no such thing as a secret.” 

“Hm...meaning?” 

“I saw you in my brother's memories,” said Raleigh. “I was able to learn of everything that happened. How I should have died...” 

“And I'm to believe that there was no way for him to conceal these truths from you?” asked Loki. 

“Believe me, he tried,” said Raleigh. “But that's not how the Drift works. You see everything, even if you don't want to. Thoughts, memories...even memories you think you've forgotten about but they're still there, like treasures waiting to be unearthed.” 

“Or nightmares better left buried six feet under,” Loki added absently. 

He only realized that he had said the words aloud upon noticing the confused expression on the blonde's face. Raleigh's eyebrows furrowed together slightly. 

“Well...yeah,” he said. “Guess you do understand.” 

“Of course I do, human,” Loki snapped in order to hide his embarrassment. “Didn't I advise you not to underestimate me?” 

“That you did...” Raleigh said with a thin smile. “So...” 

“Well? What is it?” Loki asked, even though he was already sure of the blonde's request.

“My brother...” said Raleigh. “I'd like to ask you to bring him back.” 

If Loki could have in his current form, he would have snorted. “How delightful...it is now clear that the two of you are most assuredly related.”

“Yeah, well you're going to find that I'm not nearly as selfless,” said Raleigh. “The only way to bring him back is to go back to a time where he was still alive, right?”

“Correct,” said Loki. “You cannot bring back to life a person in a time period they have not yet experienced.”

“Then want a do-over of the day I lost him,” Raleigh said decisively. 

“And what are you hoping that will accomplish?” asked Loki. 

“On separate occasions, Yancy and I each died only because I suggested we go after the Kaiju,” said Raleigh. “Against our superior's orders.” 

“I see,” Loki said, understanding. “You believe that if you change one event, you will, in turn, alter the outcome of the day.”

“Not just any event,” said Raleigh. 

“Ah...” said Loki. “I take it that you believe that one moment to be the one that is capable of tipping the scales of fate in your favor?” 

“Are you telling me I'm wrong?” Raleigh asked. 

Loki sighed softly. “Hm...who can say?” 

This answer caused the blonde to give him an incredulous look. “You mean to say that you don't know?” 

“Fate is slippery,” said Loki. “I can manipulate its strands to a degree, but that does not always guarantee one will reach the conclusion desired.” 

Raleigh frowned. “But with your help, my brother was able to change everything.” 

“Ah, yes,” Loki agreed. “But he changed more than one thing. He had asked for a whole lifetime, and I doubt he made effort to relive your past to the letter.” 

“All right...? So then take me back to the beginning too, then,” said Raleigh. 

“And that, I'm afraid, I cannot allow,” Loki said after a short pause. “Or rather...I regret that I am no longer capable of performing such a feat.” 

“What do you mean?” Raleigh asked, confused. “I thought...?” 

“Perhaps if you had managed to obtain my stone before the other mortal did, we would be having a much different conversation right now,” said Loki. “As it stands, I'm afraid my hands are a bit tied...figuratively speaking, of course.” 

Raleigh's shoulders sagged slightly. “I don't understand. So...there's a limit to how often your resources can be used?” 

“Not typically,” said Loki. “However, I'm in a bit of a predicament at the moment.” 

“In what way?” asked Raleigh. 

“My brother's people were less than amused that I tampered with the flow of time of your planet,” said Loki. 

Raleigh raised an eyebrow. “They noticed?” 

“Of course they noticed,” said Loki. “Even I don't possess magic strong enough to change the time line of the god realm.” 

Raleigh's eyebrows scrunched together in confusion. “I'm not sure I understand...” 

“Then allow me to simply things for you, _mortal_ ,” said Loki. “Time changed here. It did not elsewhere. My brother's people may be fools for merriment and drink, but even they aren't so oblivious to unexpected change in their neighboring realms.” 

Even with this supposedly simplified explanation, Raleigh still found himself confused—particularly the part about there being other realms. However, Raleigh decided that at that moment, it was probably best not to press for more details on that subject. 

“So these other realms...” Raleigh said, trying to sound as if he at least had the slightest clue of what the trickster god might be talking about. “They were affected by what you did?” 

A strange, unpleasant sound came from Loki's bloody avatar and it took Raleigh a moment to realize that the horrible noise was actually laughter. The blonde shifted his weight on his feet uncomfortably. 

“What's so funny...?” he asked hesitantly. 

The trickster calmed. “To suggest that our kind as a whole could be affected by something so trivial. No...I suppose you're partially right, though.” 

“What do you mean by that?” asked Raleigh. 

“Most of the god realm care not for your kind,” said Loki. “For you all are but temporary stars with incredibly short lifespans. My brother, however, is unfortunately rather smitten with one of your kind.” 

“So? What does that have to do with anything?” 

“Really, it never ceases to amaze me how stupid your kind are,” said Loki. “Then again, I suppose I shouldn't be so surprised...your world is still very young.”

“Well? You going to answer my question or you going to keep flaunting your age at me, old man?” asked Raleigh. 

Loki shook his head. “Strange how you feel as if you can speak to me so casually. Your brother was very much the same way.” 

Raleigh shrugged. “Fighting Kaiju will do that to you—you learn to live without fear.” 

“Wrong. _Ignorance_ will do that to you,” Loki countered. “For how can one fear what one is incapable of understanding? I have observed you and your brother from time to time. And as excited as you both were to fight, I could also see the trepidation in your eyes as you fought the monsters, because you both knew what they were capable of.” 

Loki then took a step forward, his bloody form towering over the blonde. As the God of Lies and Mischief advanced upon him, Raleigh unconsciously found himself taking several steps back.

“So don't be so quick to tell me that you are _without fear_ , pathetic mortal. I can see through your lies for what they are,” Loki said derisively. “To think otherwise is complete and utter foolishness.” 

Raleigh's lips pressed into a firm line. Despite his irritation, Loki found that he was not at all surprised that the blonde was holding his ground. 

“I'm not afraid of you,” Raleigh said evenly, insisting. 

Loki backed off slightly, deciding he would show mercy for the moment. “Very well. You want an explanation? You will have it.” 

“Great,” Raleigh said sarcastically. “I'm all ears.”

“By turning back time, events were not only erased from yours and your brother's histories, but of everyone else on this world as well,” said Loki. 

“Ah,” Raleigh said, eyes widening with realization. 

If Loki could have in his current form, he would have smirked. “Finally, you understand.” 

“So I'm guessing you erased whatever they had together too,” said Raleigh. “Your brother and the girl you mentioned before, I mean. That's what made your brother so mad...right?” 

“Precisely. You see, tampering with the stream of time on your world wasn't just an act of charity on my part,” said Loki. “Your brother was a fool to think I really valued his life so much to make such an exchange. Taking it was merely a formality. I can't have you pitiful creatures thinking I'm giving free handouts now, can I?” 

Raleigh frowned and his fists clenched at his sides. “ _What?_ You telling me he didn't have to die?” 

“Perhaps, perhaps not,” Loki said in a bored tone. “Who's to say?” 

“Bastard...!” Raleigh hissed. 

“Not a word I haven't been called before,” Loki said in a casual tone, clearly unfazed. “You Midgardians have such a limited vocabulary for insults.” 

Raleigh's jaw tightened. Loki watched with mild amusement as the blonde attempted to contain his rage. There was something about the man that resonated with Loki in a way that the trickster never expected to relate to a mortal. Even without the knowledge he had from having occasionally observed the blonde in his second lifetime, Loki could see the parallels between them just as much as the man's older brother had reminded Loki of his own brother, Thor. 

“Please...” Raleigh said finally in a low voice, his eyes downcast. 

Loki contemplated for a moment. He knew what the man wanted even without finishing his request. However, it was a matter of whether or not Loki felt compelled to fulfill it. The trickster was not known to simply lend a hand just for the sake of helping another; he had to have something to gain as well. 

The first time, there had been a reason. Loki had wanted to drive a wedge between what he considered to be a wretch of a human and Thor. The timing of Yancy Becket's request had just been a convenient coincidence and the perfect excuse to give Loki reason to do what he did; erase the past to pave way for a new future under the guise of goodwill when really, the trickster had his own agenda, as always. Loki knew better than anyone that he only had himself to blame for his brother's straying affections—Thor was not really known for his focus—but he'd be damned before letting another take what was rightfully his. 

Sensing he was quickly losing an opportunity, Raleigh spoke up. “A life for a life, wasn't it?” 

His train of thought interrupted, Loki found himself focusing once more on the blonde. “What?” 

“The deal you made with my brother,” said Raleigh. “For you to bring me back.” 

“It was, but _surely_ you're not thinking of trying to strike the same bargain?” Loki sneered. 

Raleigh stuck out his chin slightly. “And if I was?” 

“Then I would tell you that you're a fool to think I would waste what remains of my precious resources,” said Loki. 

“What if I offered you a life other than mine?” asked Raleigh. “Lives, actually. Would that work?” 

Despite the fact that the blonde was clearly missing the point, Loki decided there was no harm in entertaining the man for a moment. “Surely you jest. Who could you possibly know would be so willing to take your place at no benefit to themselves?” 

“Didn't say they'd be willing,” said Raleigh. “They just wouldn't know.” 

Now Loki was somewhat intrigued. “Oh?” 

Raleigh's voice grew soft and he averted his gaze. “Each time one of us died that night, it was because we were trying to save a boat of fishermen. At my suggestion...” 

“Ah, I see,” Loki said, immediately understanding. “How interesting.” 

“I told you I wasn't nearly as selfless as my brother,” Raleigh said tightly. 

Loki immediately recognized the statement as a half-truth. If he were in his true form, he may have bared his teeth into one of his many trademark smiles; particularly the one of mild amusement mixed with a dash of surprise and the barest hints of appreciation. Perhaps the human was growing on him a bit after all, Loki decided. In a rare moment of empathy, the trickster was able to acknowledge within himself that he understood what the blonde was saying, perhaps _too_ well. Perhaps the sentiment wasn't exactly the same, but Loki felt that he too would sacrifice anything to keep his older brother in his clutches. 

“Indeed you did,” Loki finally murmured in agreement. 

He fully expected Raleigh to continue squirming under his gaze. Instead, the blonde surprised him with his next words.

“Besides, wouldn't that work in your favor too?” 

“What?” Loki hissed, annoyed at being caught off-guard. 

He found himself further irritated by the knowing smirk that formed on Raleigh's face. “Sure we wouldn't be going back a lifetime, but we'd still be going back a few years now, wouldn't we?” 

“I fail to see your point,” said Loki. 

“Come on,” said Raleigh. “I know you know what I'm talking about. The girl you caused your brother to start over with by turning back the hands of the clock the first time. Even if you couldn't take me back further than the day I lost my brother, you'd still be erasing some years, right?” 

“ _On any progress Thor has made with Jane, that is, if he chose to start all over again behind your back while you're left to rot away in prison,”_ Loki's thoughts helpfully supplied. 

The man had a fair point. The fact that there was even a remote possibility of it being true burned Loki inside. 

“Well played, _mortal_ ,” Loki said with his usual signature bite. “I must admit, I didn't expect you to come up with even a remotely attractive proposition.” 

Raleigh rolled back one of his shoulders before responding. “Well, guess you shouldn't underestimate our kind either.”

For the second time since being summoned, Loki let out the unpleasant sound that was supposed to be laughter coming from his current form. This time when the trickster advanced, Raleigh remembered to stand his ground.

“Oh, I like you,” Loki said, and Raleigh couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or serious. “Just for being so delightfully entertaining, I will go ahead and grant your wish, provided that you stick to the terms.” 

“Which are?” Raleigh asked.

“Come now, don't disappoint me!” said Loki. “You were doing so well...”

Raleigh quickly thought over what he should say next and said the first thing that came to mind. “The life exchange?”

“You see? I knew you'd remember,” said Loki. “Now, do you remember what you said earlier?” 

“About the fishermen?” 

“Yes.” 

Raleigh nodded. “I do.” 

“Good,” said Loki. “You are to leave that boat alone to fend for itself.” 

“Understood,” said Raleigh. 

“Now then,” Loki said, holding out one of his blood-red limbs. “Your hand? I do suppose you've seen how exactly this works, thanks to the memories you claim to have obtained from your brother.” 

“Yes,” Raleigh confirmed, stretching out one of his own arms to meet with Loki's.

No further words were exchanged. The last thing Raleigh remembered before suddenly losing consciousness was the fleeting moment of dread that overcame him as the trickster's bloody form transformed into something more fluid, rapidly wrapping around him and swallowing him whole.


	3. Imperfect Spell

The events that occurred immediately after Loki had once again reset Earth's clock—though only partially this time—happened quickly and all at once. Raleigh woke up with his head spinning and back in the room he shared with his brother in the Anchorage Shatterdome where it was once again the fateful morning of the Kaiju attack that had already twice changed everything. This time when Raleigh heard the digital voice announce that the Kaiju called Knifehead had emerged from the breach, he didn't jump out of bed with excitement. Instead, he took a deep breath and got up slowly. For a few minutes he stared at his brother's peaceful features as he slept, blissfully unaware, and with tears stinging his eyes Raleigh was reminded of how heavy a sleeper Yancy had always been. 

Raleigh reached out his slightly trembling hands and placed them around his brother's face. Upon feeling the solidity of his brother's form, giving Raleigh confirmation that his brother was indeed once again real, the tears he was barely holding back before began to flow freely down his cheeks. He wanted so desperately to ignore the call, to let his older brother continue sleeping, but Raleigh knew that what they had to do that day couldn't be avoided. 

So Raleigh did the only thing he could. He quickly wiped his face against his shoulder before pressing an affectionate kiss against his older brother's temple, and then whispered lovingly into his brother's ear. 

“Hey Yance...! Time to get up. We're needed.” 

His brother let out a soft groan and his eyes fluttered open. Raleigh raked his fingers gently through his brother's hair while allowing Yancy to take his time in getting up. After a few seconds, Yancy looked up into Raleigh's eyes and gave the younger man a sleepy smile. 

“What time is it...?” 

Raleigh chuckled, still stroking his brother's hair. “Just a little after two.” 

Yancy raised an eyebrow. “ _A.M._?” 

“Yeah,” Raleigh said with a small laugh. “You didn't like it the first two times either.” 

Yancy's brows furrowed together in confusion. “What...?” 

“ _Shit,”_ Raleigh thought. 

He hadn't meant to say that out loud. He shook his head as Yancy gave him a look that seemed to demand further explanation. 

“Nothing,” Raleigh said. “Never mind. Come on, Yance. We need to get suited up. Another Kaiju's popped out of the breach. They're calling it Knifehead. Category Three. Biggest one yet.” 

“Damn...and here I was hoping to sleep in a little more,” Yancy said as he stretched out his limbs. 

“Hey, I gave you at least five more minutes,” Raleigh said with a small smile, because he really had. 

“Sure you did, kid,” Yancy said with a laugh as he rolled onto his stomach before jumping down from the top bunk and rubbed at his face with his hands, letting out a small sigh as he did so. “What a way to start the day, eh?” 

Raleigh half-smiled. “Yeah...” 

Yancy looked at his brother and tilted his head slightly to one side. “Hey...what's the matter with you this morning, huh? You're usually more excited about this sort of thing.” 

“Ah...I don't know. Guess I'm still trying to wake up too,” Raleigh said, shrugging his shoulders. 

Yancy quirked an eyebrow. “Tired? _You_...?”

“Yeah, is it that unusual?” Raleigh asked, even though he knew as well as his brother did that it was.

“Hm...well all right,” Yancy said, ruffling the younger man's hair affectionately before walking past him to go take a shower. “If you say so, kid.”

“Wait, Yance!” Raleigh said, grabbing his brother by the wrist. 

His brother turned to look back at him with a confused expression. “Yeah, Rals?” 

Raleigh closed the gap between them and gave his brother a firm kiss on the lips, which Yancy reciprocated. He leaned into the older man when Yancy rested his hands on Raleigh's hips. When they parted, Raleigh pressed his forehead against Yancy's, his eyes still shut. He felt his older brother's hands move up to carress his face gently. 

“What is it, Rals? This isn't like you,” said Yancy. “What's going on?” 

“You know I love you, right, Yance?” Raleigh asked. 

“Yeah, kid, I know,” Yancy said, chuckling softly. “Love you too.” 

Raleigh pulled away from his brother reluctantly, but his hand trailed back down to his brother's wrist and lingered there. Yancy slowly pulled his arm back and took Raleigh's hand in his own, drawing it up to his lips to press a kiss against the younger man's knuckles.

“C'mon, kiddo,” Yancy said, his eyes twinkling in mild amusement. “You going to let me get washed up now or what?”

“Yeah, all right,” Raleigh said with a nod as he let go. 

He frowned as he felt a strange twist in his stomach when Yancy turned his back and headed towards the bathroom. Raleigh took a step forward. 

“Yancy, wait...!” 

His brother turned around once more and leaned against the door frame, raising an eyebrow at Raleigh. “Yeah? What is it now, Rals?” 

Raleigh tilted his chin up slightly. “Let me hop in there with you.”

Yancy laughed and stepped aside. He tilted his head in the direction of the shower. 

“Well, come on then! What are you waiting for, kid?”

Raleigh gave his brother one of his playful smiles before taking his shirt off and tossing it behind him. Yancy allowed himself to enjoy his brother's little striptease and caught Raleigh in his arms when the younger man rushed towards him. Raleigh ran his fingers through his older brother's hair as their smiling lips met for a kiss. Yancy slammed the bathroom door shut with one of his feet and the two men laughed their way into the shower. 

In the same moment where Raleigh had woken up on the day of the Knifehead fight for a third time, an alarm sounded on Asgard. Thor heard it immediately—he hadn't been a restful sleeper in years at this point. He quickly dressed himself in proper attire and met his friend Fandral somewhere in a hallway, bearing news confirming what Thor had already been suspecting. 

“Not quite sure how he did it, my lord,” said Fandral. 

Thor shook his head. “It doesn't matter how he did it, my friend. What matters only is what exactly he did. Tell me, Fandral. What further trouble has my brother caused from his prison cell?” 

“He's somehow managed to manipulate the strands of time on Midgard once more,” said Fandral. 

Thor frowned. “How extensive is the damage?” 

“Not as much as before,” said Fandral. “But at least several years.” 

Thor's jaw clenched. “Fine. I speak with him now.” 

Fandral gave the thunder god a slight bow of the head. “Very good, my lord. I shall inform the guards.” 

Thor nodded in response. “Thank you, Fandral.”

On Earth, Raleigh and Yancy were once again suited up inside Gipsy Danger, ready to defend the Miracle Mile. This time, they would be following orders. 

“ _Initiating neural handshake!”_ both brothers heard their friend Tendo's voice come through their speakers. _“In three...two...!”_

Since he hadn't made the same promise of keeping what he knew a secret from his brother, Raleigh made not even the slightest attempt at concealing or filtering any of his thoughts and memories in the Drift. When they stabilized, Raleigh turned his head to meet Yancy's gaze and was unsurprised by the look of shock on his brother's face.

“Rals...?” 

“All of it's true,” Raleigh confirmed. 

Yancy swallowed, his face pale. “So...we leave the boat alone then?” 

Raleigh wet his lips and nodded, his expression equally grim. “Yeah. We do.” 

And they did. Both brothers watched with a heavy heart as Knifehead lifted up the fisherman's boat and tossed it over its shoulder like it was nothing. The two brothers simultaneously clenched their fists and commanded Gipsy's arms to raise. Not allowing themselves to be fooled a third time, they were prepared when the Kaiju decided to suddenly surge from the ocean and charged at them. They fired at the Kaiju three times with their Plasmacasters and when Knifehead finally fell, seemingly for good, the brothers were sure that they had won this time. Even Pentecost and the Shatterdome technicians seemed sure. 

Which is why they weren't at all ready when Knifehead surprised them, briefly resurrected by barbaric rage, butting its head into Gipsy Danger, spearing open and exposing Yancy's side of the cockpit. Right at that moment, both brothers looked at each other in a panicked daze and Raleigh's eyes widened as he just realized something he hadn't thought of before. Then, he had one angry and desperate thought ring clearly over the Drift. 

“ _Oh **shit**...!”_  

He didn't know how much it mattered, but the one thing Raleigh had forgotten to change was for them to both go back to their original positions from the time before Yancy had first tampered with their past, with Raleigh on the right side and his older brother operating Gipsy Danger's left arm. Quickly, Raleigh opened up his left hand and commanded their Jaeger to charge up their remaining Plasmacaster. He tried his best to ignore the sinking feeling in his gut when he saw the subtle shake of his brother's head. 

“ _I'm sorry, Raleigh...there just isn't any time.”_  

“ _No, **fuck you** , Yance!” _Raleigh mentally growled back at his brother. _“I'm not letting this happen to us again, not for a third time! God **dammit**_ _why won't this cannon charge faster...?!”_  

The Kaiju roared. Tears stung Raleigh's eyes. He hated the look Yancy was giving him—fear, pain and sadness reflecting in his eyes, all at once.

“Raleigh, listen to me,” Yancy shouted. “Listen—” 

“ _No...no...!”_ Raleigh thought frantically. _“Just a second longer, I can do this! I can finish it!”_  

And he did, screaming while aiming the cannon right at Knifehead's chest, just after the Kaiju had already ripped Yancy out of his pilot's chair and flung him out into the ocean. The Kaiju fell to its death shortly after, the last of its life force completely used up, but Raleigh wasn't having it. He lost his mind for a moment, charging up the Plasmacaster once more and firing down in the direction where the Kaiju had fallen, repeating the action over and over again until the Jaeger ran out of juice, tears of frustration streaming angrily down his charred face. 

His brothers last words seemed to echo endlessly in his mind in the Drift, but they brought Raleigh very little comfort. For the second time, he'd experienced Yancy's death. It was like ripping open an old wound and pouring a truckload of salt onto it. For the second time, Raleigh had felt all of Yancy's pain as he died. 

“ _I love you, Rals. It's okay.”_  

Raleigh screamed uncontrollably and he no longer knew if he was doing so in his mind or out loud. With the Plasmacaster completely used up, all Raleigh could do now was have the battered Jaeger thrash around. Pentecost sent out a team to recover him, but his announcing of the same to Raleigh fell on deaf ears. Raleigh's ears heard, but the man himself didn't understand the frantic words of his superior and comrades trying to communicate with him in the speakers over his head. The only thing his mind was filled with was Yancy. 

“ _I love you, Rals.”_  

“ _No, Yancy! Don't go! It wasn't supposed to happen like this...not again!”_  

“ _It's okay.”_  

“ _No, **dammit** , Yancy! It's not!”_ 

“ _It's okay.”_  

“ _It's **not**...!”_  

“ _It's okay...”_  

This all happened in a matter of minutes. When Thor finally thundered into the dungeons where his brother was being held, Loki was screaming. Thor rushed towards his brother's cell and slammed his hands against the clear barrier. 

“Loki!” Thor shouted, concern temporarily overtaking any feelings of anger or irritation. “Brother!”

After a few moments, Loki stilled. He remained turned away from his brother. Frowning, Thor smacked one of his palms twice against the cell's barrier as he called out for his brother again. 

“Loki!” 

Slowly, the trickster straightened his posture. His slender frame trembled, but with what emotion, Thor couldn't place, not without seeing his brother's face. Seeing as Loki was making no move to respond, Thor decided to broach the subject of why he was there in the first place. 

“So I see you've somehow managed to turn Midgard on its head, yet again,” Thor said with a sigh. “Tell me, Brother...what is the reason for this madness, so that I may try and understand...” 

His brother stopped shaking then, but still refused to turn. Thor felt his irritation rising from within. 

“Have you truly nothing to say?” asked Thor. “Because I find that rather hard to believe, Loki.”

Finally, his brother turned, and Thor was surprised to see the look of anguish on the other man's face. He also took note of the orb Loki had cupped between his hands.

“Loki...” Thor said, his voice softer this time. “What have you done, Brother? Tell me.” 

For a moment it was as if the two men were transported back in time themselves when their eyes met; just two boys, two brothers. One with a problem and the other ready to console—perhaps even solve—to the best of his ability. 

“I don't understand...” Loki said finally, his voice somewhat shaky. “What went wrong...why it didn't _work_.” 

“What do you mean?” Thor pressed gently. “What didn't work?” 

Loki shook his head, staring blankly at the orb in his hands. “I thought I gauged the limit of my powers properly. I never thought I'd make such a blunder in casting the spell.”

When their eyes met once more, Thor's eyes widened; he understood. His brother had given him such a look before once, long ago. Loki had tried to mend the broken wing of a bird they had found together in one of the palace gardens and he had, by accident, ended up killing the creature instead. Loki had been inconsolable for weeks upon weeks after. After that incident, Loki had taken extreme care to cast his spells with the utmost precision. 

“Oh, Loki...” Thor said softly, his voice pained. “Brother...what on earth did you try to mend?” 

The trickster numbly held out the orb to Thor much in the way he had held the bird up to his brother back then. Upon closer inspection, Thor realized that he could see images playing in the orb like it was a miniature screen. He could see the face of a young man who was wearing an expression of contorted agony and despair.

Thor looked up at his brother, shaking his head. “I don't understand...is this happening now?”

“It is,” Loki said in a voice only loud enough for his brother's ears.

“Just what were you trying to accomplish?” Thor asked. 

“He lost his brother in the previous life and wanted him back,” said Loki. “And the only reason he was able to ask of me that is because his brother asked the same of me years ago, in their first life, when it was the younger and not the older who originally died.” 

Thor took all the information in and thought over his next words carefully before speaking. “Well, Brother...it sounds as if it was always meant for the two of them to be separated. 'Tis their fate.” 

“If _fate_ were in control, as you say, then how is it that I was able to help change which one came out of their battle unscathed, hm?” Loki snapped, glaring at the thunder god. “Following your logic, their roles should have been set in stone as well, don't you think?”

Thor let out a soft sigh then and a small silence fell between the two gods. For a time, Thor seemed to be fascinated with his hands. In reality, he was unconsciously reaching for Loki, imagining what it might be like to have his younger brother in his arms once again. His eyes eventually trailed back, all the way upward, and when the thunder god spoke once again, his voice was strained. 

“Sometimes, Loki...” Thor trailed off briefly before starting again. “We are not meant to have what our heart desires most.”

He was referring to himself, but the trickster heard otherwise, for the words also applied accurately to him. Loki gave Thor a bitter smile. 

“Is that so?” he spat, but with more sadness than ire. 

“It is,” Thor said firmly, giving his brother a curt nod as if to emphasize his point. “Now, I pray you'll think on what you've done while I see what I can do about fixing the damage you've caused.” 

Loki was able to stop his brother by dissipating the orb in his hands before smacking them hard against the barrier of his cell, effectively regaining Thor's attention. The thunder god turned once more to face him, eying the younger man warily. Loki then clasped his hands behind his back and leaned forward slightly. 

“What is it, Loki?” Thor asked tiredly. 

“You asked me before the reason for my madness,” Loki said, teeth clenching tightly together in a feral smile as he enunciated the last word of his sentence. “Well, Brother...? Shall I tell you?” 

Thor threw up a hand in mild disgust. “Fie! Enough! I care nothing for your explanations riddled with lies and half-truths.” 

Loki's lips pressed into a thin line at his brother's response. He made no move to stop his brother a second time as the other man turned on his heels and marched towards the exit, his red cape flowing behind him. The god of thunder marched back to his chambers, hell-bent, and not a soul stood in his way or asked what had transpired between himself and his brother in the catacombs. He threw open and shut the doors of his chambers with great force as he entered them, and it wasn't until he was completely certain that he was alone did Thor finally lean against a great pillar and lamented his sorrows. For no matter what he did, he and his brother would always be at odds, it seemed. It made him weary as much as it broke his heart. 

Meanwhile, shortly after hearing the loud sound of the dungeon's main doors thudding shut, Loki closed his eyes and grimaced before turning around in his cell. Despite the limitations on his magic, he was still able to cast an illusory spell that made it appear as if he were still his usual composed self so that he could have some privacy from his fellow less-than-sympathetic dungeon mates that were being held in neighboring confines. Only after he was sure his mirage was in place did Loki finally allow himself to crumble, lowering himself to a sitting position with one leg propped up and the other stretched out before him. Loki rested a hand on top of his bent knee and leaned his head back against the wall behind him as he let out a soft chuckle, his eyes still closed. 

“Well, I'm so glad you asked,” Loki said in quiet sarcasm to no one at all. “The source, my darling brother, is none other than _you_...”


End file.
